Sings America

by

David Hasselhoff

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As Shakespeare once wrote "Hold thy peace, thou knave, hold thy peace". I guarantee you'll be holding yours once you've slipped this magnificent CD into its receptacle.

The Shakespeare comparison does not end there, as Dougal Floosenborff is the "Shakey" of our generation. Fish out of Marillion once sang "Where are the poets - where are the visionaries...?" He clearly had not encountered the Hoffmeister!

This CD stretches the boundaries (and receptacles!) and pushes the imagination to the hilt! Every song an original master by the master. If you're fed up with losers who blatantly steal other people's hard work to have a hit or two, then this CD is for you. It is utterly incredible and incomparable.

Arlo Guthrie, The Mamas and the Papas, Madonna, John Denver, Niel Diamond - hell, even Elvis Presley all owe a debt of thanks to the songs that appear here, courtesy of the ex-mulletted Baywatch star.

Now if that ain't genius on a level with Shakespeare, then I'm David's lovechild.

The song "Hot Shot City" is particularly good - even though it's not on this disc.

David Hasselhof sounds like a drunk man at a Karaoke Bar on Friday night. Come on, folks!! How can anyone tolerate the former Baywatch and Night Rider Star attempting to cover a Madonna Song?? Sheryl Crow's pop rock rendition of Guns and Roses "Sweet Child of Mine" was better than Hasselhof's rendition of "La Isla Bonita", and I'm a 80's Metal Fan. What's next, Hof- GNR's "Welcome to the Jungle" with a Barry Manilow/Vegas Lounge singer beat??

Perhaps the Germans like the Hof because he's comic relief after pounding one too many Hefeweizens at a Beer Tent. He also probably sounds good after popping shrooms or smoking some of that legal Amsterdam Marijuana.

At least all the women in Swimsuits made up for his mediocre acting in Baywatch. With this CD, there's no avoiding the Hof's washed-up Reno, Nevada Casino lounge act quality performance.