Planet Earth

by

Prince

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I should begin this review by telling you what I was expecting from Planet Earth: not much. I've learned several painful lessons over the last 12 years, from various Prince stinkers (Stink-os & Disorder, Rave Un2 The Stink Fantastic, The Rainbow Stink), but the main lesson is this: Prince's fastball ain't what it used to be. I can accept that now. There was a time when I couldn't accept that, a time when I proclaimed Emancipation to be the greatest album of the 90s, and in fact as good as Purple Rain.

Now I'm older and hopefully more mature (though I did throw on Emancipation one more time the other night, still searching for that greatness I thought I once heard). After the horrific artistic crime that was The Rainbow Children, I officially gave up on Prince. It was SO CLEARLY OVER. And everyone knew it but pointy-headed critics and him.

But of course, as a fan I never stopped hoping. When Musicology came out, of course I bought it. However, I waited two whole months instead of rushing right out to get it. As an album, Musicology was definitely an improvement (which is like saying North is better than When I Was Cruel), but overall it was not a good album. I listened to it for a week and then put it away, saying he had gone away from pretentious concept junk and was back to putting out bland junk.

However, two songs did stick in my mind: "Call My Name", and "What Do You Want Me 2 Do?" Those two diamonds in the dogpile did provide a flicker of hope. And let me tell you, those two songs are as good as anything Prince has ever done (so is 1+1+1 Is 3, but it's on The Rainbow Children and that album is a total affront). There was something else, too, but I couldn't figure out what it was, and I didn't want to revisit "Illusion, Coma, Pimp & Circumstance" ad nauseum.

Then came 3121, which is easily Prince's best album in a long time, since his acoustic "The Truth" CD that accompanied his 3-CD Crystal Ball. Then I understood. With Musicology, 3121, and now Planet Earth, he has stopped trying to say, "I'm brilliant." He is now trying to say, "Play this song, you'll like it." That's a good move.

He is now Radio-Friendly Prince, the good company man that Warner Bros. has always wanted him to be. No fake voices, no weird and ultimately dumb interludes between songs between characters in slowed-down voices. Just a collection of 10-12 songs clocking in at under 45 minutes, designed to go Top Ten.

Now Planet Earth finds him once again content to follow trends as opposed to setting them. And you know what? I'm actually ecstatic about that. So while Planet Earth represents Prince running in place, as opposed to the quantum leap in quality that was 3121, for Prince that's a bit of a victory. It means I still have some hope for the next album (which I pray won't be released until 2010).

Planet Earth careens dangerously toward the bland, and initially I dismissed it. But "Mr. Good Night", "Guitar", and "Chelsea Rodgers" all find Prince in fine form. Even the token "Arms Of Orion" cut (named for his worst song on the album) isn't utterly skippable, the way "Te Amo Corazon" was on 3121. On Planet Earth, the "Arms Of Orion" Badtastic Song Award goes to "All The Midnights In The World".

But in the end, this is not the album for newcomers to Prince to start with. And while I'm still in the Prince Artistic Desert, I'm now seeing vegetation as opposed to sand and rocks. I may never discover water again, but for the first time my hope has not yet been shaken.

And that next Prince album? I'll be buying it the day it comes out.

...because we're the only ones that will put up with such mediocre tripe from a man who knows better. First let me say that I love Prince, even when I chunk money down for stuff that should have never had a price tag on it. Not everything that pops in your head needs to be set to music. Overall, I like three songs on this: Guitar, Somewhere here on earth and Mr. Goodnight. Lyric wise: I could have written The one U want to C-probably like in the Junior High. Prince is very good writing senusal lyrics, but whenever he starts his political agenda stuff, it suddenly sounds juvenile and campy. Like: Planet Earth and Resolutions. He truely could have kept : All the midnights in the world. It's only tolerable because it's so short. While he's waxing proses about the problem with wars and people, I think the problem with telling certain people that they are musical geniuses is that they start slacking off and start pasting weak lyrics on recycled beats. Sorry, but some of these songs sound eerily familar. Still, I'm a sucker for my 80s icon and I'll continue to follow his music journey. Overall, get for your collection, but try to get yourself one of those free copies if you can.